Life…or something like it.

jmorrison07 — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 02:44:43 +0000

Updates updates updates…
It is now 2010. I am living by myself in Portland, OR. I have one pesky class to finish so I can have my Elementary Education degree and I am still, yes still, single.
Living on your own is quite a different experience. All of the little messes that pop up here and there are all your own, when you want someone to talk to about something exciting or you need another perspective, the walls don’t make for the best conversationalists. On the other hand, you don’t have to worry about being quiet when you wake up in the morning or when you’re a night owl like me and can’t find sleep until 2 am. You can sing and dance around like a crazy person and don’t have anyone looking at you like you’ve lost your mind and when you do want peace and quiet, you’ve got it. My mom came up right after I moved in here and helped me decorate the place to make it look a little more homey with some pictures and a cute little couch that folds down to a twin bed. I have to say, I’m pretty blessed with this set up and appreciate every moment I get to spend here.
My pesky class is macroeconomics and I have to say it is the most difficult class I have taken in my college career. Probably because I just want to be finished and wish it would some how just magically appear as credit on my transcript so I can have my degree and start teaching. I did a fine job avoiding this class through out the years, but now it is the one thing standing between me and a bunch of wonderful little kids that I’d get to spend time with every day…I know, I know, just get it over with, right? :) I’m goin’…
As for the single status It has been that way for over two years now. I have had a few interests in that time, but in each instance, things just weren’t right in some way or another. I have had my ups and downs wishing I had someone to be there beside me and to share my life with, but I haven’t found him yet. Most days I am perfectly content doing my own thing but then I get together with friends and they are all engaged, married or having kids which just pours salt in that little cut. hahaha Someday. I will just keep telling myself that and enjoy my time with no strings attached while I can.
In other news, I have taken up wood carving recently and have fallen in love with it. My fingers are torn to shreds, but I keep going because it is something I have loved doing since I can remember. I always used to try and make things out of random pieces of wood it’d find on hikes or in the yard. It was always too hard to really do anything with though. Now I have found the right wood and hope to improve my skills enough that I can make life size duck decoys, eventually. I have also become a pen pal with a guy I met at Southwestern Oregon Community College a few years back. He and I had a good time hanging out fishing and going to the beach once or twice when I was there but when we left, we never talked again. I always wondered how he was doing and one day toward the end of the summer I decided to see if the phone # I had for him was still his. It was and we started talking a lot. I found out he is in the Marines now and was being deployed to Afghanistan in a month so we exchanged addresses and have been writing letters ever since. It’s been fun getting to write the good ole fashioned way and hearing random little stories he sends. I have always enjoyed writing so sometimes he ends up with several pages of random things I have been doing or thinking about. We’ve found out we have a lot more in common than, well, anyone I’ve ever met. I have gotten two phone calls from him in the three months he’s been gone and they have been some of the best calls ever. Since it takes over a month for a letter to get over there or back here, I never know how he is so when he calls it’s nice to know he’s still safe. Anyway, I could go on and on, but I just want to end by saying I am very proud of him and the part he is playing in keeping our country free and safe. If you are reading this please stop and say a little prayer for our troops.

I never told you…

jmorrison07 — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 20:42:51 +0000

These are the lyrics from a Colbie Caillat song called I never Told You. They seem very fitting for my life right now…I have had this friend for a couple years who I am in love with, but there are just some things that would never work between us so instead of telling him how I really felt, “I just held it in…”

I miss those blue eyes/how you kiss me at night/I miss the way we sleep…

Like there’s no sunrise, like the taste of your smile, I miss the way we breathe…

But I never told you, what I should have said,

I never told you, I just held it in…

And now, I miss everything about you,

Can’t believe I still want you,

After all the things we’ve been through,

I miss everything about you, without you…

I see your blues eyes every time I close mine…you make it hard to see.

Where I belong to when I’m not around you, it’s like I’m not with me.

But I never told you what I should have said, no I never told you, I just held it in…

And now, I miss everything about you.

I can’t believe that I still want you (and I knew that I never shoulda walked away)

After all the things we’ve been through (I know it’s never gonna come again)

I miss everything about you, without you

But I never told you what I should have said…

No, I never told you, I just held it in…

And now, I miss everything about you (still you’re gone)

Can’t believe that I still want you,

After all things we’ve been through,

I miss everything about you, without you…

~Thanks for everything you have done. I will never forget those nights when I just needed a shoulder to lean on or someone to slap some sense back into me when I was being unreasonable or as some might say, a “drama queen.” Too bas those times that you made me feel like crap about myself overshadow all of the great times we had. You have mare to you than you let show and I hope that one day you can let that caring person you have locked up inside out.

Jmorrison07's Blog

Life…or something like it.

I never told you…